Would your marriage survive if you went on vacation for a year? A book review of the Marriage Vacation by Pauline Turner Brooks

Men can often leave their family, wife and kids, for months on end, either for work or for adventure, and no one thinks twice about it. It’s socially acceptable for men to do this. But what would happen if a woman did this for close to a year, not for work but for taking time for herself, for her own self-rediscovery? The Marriage Vacation explores just that. It follows Katherine Carmichael, Kate, who attends her university friend’s wedding without her husband, who last minute had to work. Her university friend, Nina, the flaky friend, fills her head with the idea of moving to Thailand at least for a couple of weeks. These weeks eventually and unintentionally turn into months.

The book explores various themes such as losing oneself in the identity of a mother and a wife, and the change in priorities that can often accompany this. Hobbies and careers can sometimes take a back burner and so do passions. Katherine postpones becoming a writer, something she has actually wanted for long. Actually, she postpones it for 10 years! When she leaves and extends her stay in Thailand, she is ostracized by her mum friends even emailing her to ask if she had a nervous breakdown. Her husband even goes ahead to file for divorce on grounds of abandonment of their children. Kate can imagine what her mother-in-law has to say about her ‘marriage vacation’, she was never her biggest fan.

The Marriage Vacation also explores war and the plight of women and their children in refugee camps, aid work, as well as passport and white privilege. Furthermore, volun-tourism (yes it’s a real thing) is also discussed. Other themes that are briefly discussed are love in old age, living together apart, male and wealth privilege, sexual harassment, and cultural appropriation.

Additionally, relationships and challenges can occur in relationships such as complacency in talking about one’s needs and selfishness versus selflessness. Katherine prioritizes the needs of her husband and children over her own and in the end, ends up being resentful. In the beginning, she blames her husband for holding her back and stalling her career, but in the end, she blames herself. Kate needed to take time away from her…